Happy Halloween

Police Officers

How do you tell the difference between an American Police Officer, an Australian Police Officer, and a Canadian Police Officer?

Pose the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a Glock 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

What do you do?

CANADIAN POLICE OFFICER
Answer: (Immediate thought processes)

• Is the knife a ceremonial kirpan?
• Does he prefer to communicate in English or French?
• Will this negatively impact my chances of promotion?
• Is this just his way of telling me that he pays my wages, and wants my job?
• Would this be an appropriate time to hug him and sing Koombaya?
• Will the media do a profile of him and how he was loved by everyone including his dog?
• Is the alleged "client" a member of the NDP or an Environmental Group?
• Is he just a squeegee kid / pan handler trying to make a living on the mean streets?
• Is he a member of a gang that is just "misunderstood" by society?
• Is he a recent illegal immigrant to this country, and just doesn't know how to approach the police?
• Is he recently released on parole and hasn't been properly integrated back into the community?
• Is he a victim of fetal alcohol syndrome and just doesn't understand what he is doing?
• Is he a member of the Muslim community or other visible minority group?

Warn and Charter him as he approaches.

AUSTRALIAN POLICE OFFICER

Answer: BANG!

AMERICAN POLICE OFFICER

Answer: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click.... (reload) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click. (call for supervisor)

Another Food Video

Yumm.



»http://www.youtube.com/v/ZfbTO0GlONU

I do love cooking, but I'm not sure whether I could do anything this tasty.

Just Desserts For A Spoiled Brat

This is a bit long (OK, excruciatingly long), but worth it. We see the Judge lose her cool a couple times.



»http://www.youtube.com/v/g1Qp-hY_Zsk

He doesn't have to talk to you! You want to talk to somebody, you go to a psychiatrist!

»http://www.youtube.com/v/jxItxJJtShk

You go home, you call your therapist, and you say, "I had a bad day."!

CoolWhip, Anybody?

»http://www.youtube.com/v/PcRF8HYvj2A
Yuck.